Andros.isTeen = false;

[logomancer]

I am now twenty years old. A great deal has changed. I am no longer a teenager, for one. No more use for special words to describe my age, just xty-y until I get insanely old. It's a bit of a big step, that. And yet, despite this being the day of my birth, I am sad.

I feel alone. Lonely. Empty inside. For some reason, I am preoccupied with the fear of me at some future age having no life, of being Irrelevant and Insignificant, of having a shit job somewhere out in the middle of nowhere with no friends or companions for company. It's depressing. I am afraid of the future, for I think it might be happening to me.

I have few friends of mention at present. Few people pay me mind. When I try to do something for the rest of the group, I am shouted down and ridiculed until someone else steps up. I feel like the world has conspired against me, that I'm the butt of some cosmic joke. And I don't understand why.

I'm sorry if anything I said has hurt any of you. I've just had this sense and feeling growing inside of me for a while now, and I felt that I should let it out before it consumed me.

I just looked out my window, and it's stopped raining. I'm not sure whether that is good or bad.

Comments

[vond.livejournal.com]

Lack of self-confidence is a self-perpetuating problem, and it's a huge problem for you, I'm not sure exactly why. Try to pull yourself up out of your depression, and things will turn around on their own once you start feeling better about yourself.

Also, and this is very very important for you to remember, self-confidence and zealotry are not the same thing. Self-confidence doesn't mean feeling like you have the only correct opinion.

Also please don't take this as criticism, it's supposed to help! (by giving you an idea of why you're depressed, I hope)